Don't Crumble

I did not crumble.

I did not fall.

I wasn’t afraid, even though I made mistakes over and over.

Perfection wasn’t in my brain.

Breaking a barrier was.

What barrier did you break today?

Over and over my brain repeats, but what if I fail? I battle thoughts and tell myself you'll never know if you don't try. Since when did competitors worry so much about failing rather than going for what they want? Which contender are you?

Tennis is an individual sport. You are playing against a ball. A lot of physical, but much are mental. You can only rely on you out there. Even if you are playing doubles, you still have to do your part. You have to hold yourself accountable for everything, win or lose.

Have you ever played a match and just felt shame. Shame in your strokes, in your attitude maybe even in everything possible. Many players have felt shame in tennis, especially when they aren’t playing well. Embarrassment is a big emotion that can overtake you and make you believe something that isn’t true. Tennis players are always making tough decisions in a short amount of time. Many times shame wants to consume you when you aren't doing something right in your eyes. Humiliation will make you feel like you don’t belong. Some athletes want to retire because of irritation. Some fight through it and make the best of every opportunity. Which one are you?

To crumble or not to crumble.

To fight or not to fight.

To break barriers or not.

Have you ever crumbled on the tennis court? My goal in my last tournament was not to crumble. It was to stand tall, fight, and never have shame. I did not crawl into a shell and feel sorry for myself when things didn’t go my way. I was fearless and courageous. Win or lose, I was confident. Do you set goals for your tennis matches or career? How do you feel when you crush them?

This race is not for the swift. Don’t expect to get there in a heartbeat. Patience is a huge part of this journey.

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Akilah JamesComment